They don't drive on asphalt. Either the skis don't work or I

I’m standing on the asphalt, wearing skis. Either the skis don't work... or people have some kind of distorted idea of ​​reality. Please explain to me why everyone thinks that nanny, nurse or housekeeper are low-paid professions?

People who advise hiring service personnel in any unclear case, have you been monitoring these vacancies for a long time? Why do you think that these women receive pennies for their work, and therefore a young mother should go to work to support herself and a whole staff of workers?

Yes, nannies are not top managers. Not successful lawyers. And not celebrities. But why do you think they earn less than average? First of all, you won’t find a qualified, good nanny during the day. And, secondly, what makes you think that a woman of approximately equal intelligence to you, approximately equal level of qualifications in her field, and even in such a responsible position, next to your child, will receive less than you? It is obvious that if she is equal to her mother in all respects, she will receive the same or more, depending on her length of service. And if she is uneducated, speaks Russian poorly, lives in a basement and agrees to work for food, then is it worth letting her near your child?

The same goes for nurses. Why do you think that a person who is busy caring for a sick relative all day will work for a couple of thousand? Hey, don't you want to wrap anything? Nurses in Moscow generally earn quite well - from about 60 thousand rubles. It’s clear that if the salary is 400, and there’s also a million bonus, then you can afford it. But how many of us are like that?

The issue with housekeepers and cleaners is also unclear. For some reason everyone thinks that these are the unfortunate Aunt Zinas from their school childhood. But in fact, for a couple of hours of cleaning your apartment, the cleaner will want at least one thousand and a half. Otherwise, no one will come to you. In short, I took several screenshots of various vacancies, which for some reason many consider low-paying.

This is especially emphasized by those who classify this work as “women’s duties.”

And a young mother should support all this from her salary? How many of you can afford this? No, after all, the problem is not the skis...

Jan Harrach was the most famous owner of Hrádek u Nehanitz Castle in the Hradec Králové region, he was also famous for his love of mountain tourism, which he promoted in his domain.

In 1892 year, Jan Harrach visited the World Exhibition in Oslo, where sporting goods were presented. He decided that skis could make it easier for lumberjacks to move through the forest in winter, so he ordered the purchase several pairs of skis that were expensive at the time for forestry personnel in Krkonoše. However, already in 1895, a skiing association appeared in Jilemnice, and a few years later the first ski competitions were held.
that is, for the owner of vast estates in northern Bohemia, a politician and philanthropist from the count family of Harrach
living in the mountainous and snowy winter of the Czech Republic in 1892, SKIING turns out to be a revelation and EXPENSIVE even for the richest aristocrat
an expensive purchase if he only bought a few pairs of skis.
WHAT'S THE MATTER???? that the Czech Republic didn’t know or use skis before? Or maybe something is wrong with winter and snow?

what about this then:

Campaign of the Muscovite Rus' Army, 16th century. Painting by Ivanov S. V. 1903

and this is from the same WIKI-

Ancient rock carving of a skier. Sweden, approx. 1050 AD e.

Swiss professor Alfred King, in the Mandschu chronicle dating back to the 18th century BC, found information about hunters who, attaching wooden planks to their feet and helping themselves with two sticks, crossed snow-covered distances at high speed.

In the thirties of the 20th century, engravings with pictures of the “snow life” of the ancients were discovered in Norway, and in excavations - the remains of skis, the age analysis of which made it possible to establish that they were used as early as 4000 BC.
Since ancient times, the peoples of the North, Siberia, the Urals, and Central Russia have used skiing in various working, everyday and military conditions. When hunting, hunting skis lined with fur were used, which have survived to this day. They glided well and did not give any recoil. In everyday life, skis were used in their design, close to modern racing skis. This is evidenced by archaeological excavations of ancient Novgorod, during which specimens of such skis were discovered. Skis, the age of which is estimated at approximately 4 thousand years, were also found during excavations of a pile settlement on Lake Sennitsa, in the Nevelsky district of the Pskov region. A sensational report was made by a researcher in 1983. It is the result of 20 years of archaeological work in the south of the region. Before this, a ski kept in one of the museums in Oslo (Norway) was considered the oldest in the world. Interestingly, the ski has remained almost unchanged, but the oldest ski lacks only a guide groove. The find near Lake Sennitsa was called the Dubokray one.

Scandinavian-type skis had different lengths and were slow-moving. When moving on them, the Vikings slid only on the long left ski, and the short right one served for pushing off. It is clear that the high-speed skis of our ancestors had an advantage over those that were once invented in Scandinavia.

The northern tribes of Rus' lived in areas with long snowy winters and hunted, which was the direct reason for the invention of sliding skis. In the middle of the ski, 2 strips were attached to the sides, in which holes were made for the sock strap. The length of the ski was from 100 to 180 cm, width 12-18 cm. They were made from hardwood. Walking and hunting skis were widely and successfully used in expeditions and hunting.

and here again the problem of the chronology of technologies arises, as in shipbuilding - tools for woodworking and in general the question of SNOW and cold snap!!! because:

In the mid-15th century, skis began to be used in military affairs. The Nikon Chronicle reports that in 1444, a ski army of Russian soldiers was sent near Ryazan against the Tatars.

In 1581, the ski army began the conquest of Siberia from the Urals under the leadership of Ataman Ermak. Engravings from the 16th century have been preserved, depicting the Slavs on skis in everyday life and in military affairs. According to the historian P. Slovtsov (“Historical Review of Siberia,” 1838), the further conquest of Siberia was also accompanied by skiing. Russian artist Sergei Ivanov dedicated the painting “Ski Army on a Campaign to Ugra Land” to this event, now stored in the Moscow Ski Museum.

In the 17th century, brave Russian people made trips to the north and east, explored the vast expanses of Siberia and the Far East, going far beyond the “Stone” (Ural Mountains) along a difficult and dangerous path, trying to find out how far to the east, beyond the Urals, Siberia stretches , rich and unknown. In the 17th century, the development of the Amur region began. And the vast lands along the Lena and Amur rivers were explored by Russian Cossacks. During the hike, with the onset of winter, the explorers made skis lined with fur and walked on them without a path or road.

Our ancestors never forgot their ancient invention. The secretary of the Swedish embassy in Moscow, Mons Palm, wrote in 1617: “The Russians made an invention. They have wooden rims approximately 7 feet long and one span wide, but at the bottom they are flat and smooth. They tie them under their feet and run with them through the snow, never plunging into it, and with such speed that one can be surprised at it.”

Russian commander M.V. Skopin-Shuisky successfully used ski troops against the Poles in the 18th century.

The Ural ski chronicle was continued by the army of the leader of the rebel Yaik Cossacks, Emelyan Pugachev, and the army of the Tsarist Colonel Michelson. In 1774, huntsmen (shooters) on skis and entire ski detachments took part in the battles between them. The Russian commander Alexander Suvorov also took advantage of simple devices, and in the famous crossing of the Alps he first mounted guns on skis. Russian peasant skiers made a significant contribution to the defeat of Napoleon's army in the Patriotic War of 1812.

Due to the lack of roads in northern countries, including Russia, skis eventually began to be used as a means of transportation. Naturally, they were primarily used by rural residents. Considering the fact that in Russia villages are separated from each other by a distance of 2-3 km, in the north of the country - 5-10 km, and the distance from settlements to cities is even greater, peasants could only use skis for travel. This advantage over walking was especially quickly appreciated by children, who every day had to get to school located in a neighboring village, and then get home in the same way. And they retained this habit of skiing for many years. And therefore, famous Russian skiers more often grew up in rural areas and small towns than in large settlements.

Scandinavian sagas tell us that ski runs were also serious tests for knighthood. So in 1200, the Norwegian king created the first regiments of ski soldiers.

And in other sources we read:
The ski army existed even in pre-Petrine times, but their widespread use in the army began only at the beginning of the 20th century. In 1886, training of lower ranks in skiing began to complete special hunting teams. Hunting teams were made up of strong, dexterous and courageous young people, former hunters. These teams were sent ahead of military units and performed reconnaissance functions.

At the end of the 1890s, three-day maneuvers of ski teams of all guards infantry regiments took place near St. Petersburg. For such maneuvers, they chose the area between Galernaya harbor and Lakhta.
In February 1902, participants in such maneuvers started in Krasnoe Selo and covered a distance of 12 vers to Ligovo station. As the magazine "Sport" noted, a private of the Izmailovsky regiment was the fastest, running 12 miles in 27 minutes, he was awarded a silver watch. The rest of the participants in such maneuvers also received prizes - watches and memorable signs.

In the section to the question I’m standing on the asphalt wearing skis... What’s next? given by the author Obliquely the best answer is I stood on the asphalt wearing skis
And people thought that I was... (abnormal)
In reality everything was different
Yesterday I my boots...(broke)
When I bought boots they told me:
""WEAR DO NOT TEAR"", but probably...(they lied to me)
Repairing them from breakdown didn’t save them either.
The shoemaker was probably...(not a good person)
And here on the asphalt I'm wearing skis
And if the skis don't work, then I'm... oh

Answer from Horoscope[guru]
Either the skis don't work, or I... oh

Answer from Caucasian[expert]
I’m standing on the asphalt wearing skis. It's because the skis aren't working because I'm crazy.

Answer from Yatyana[guru]
I'm standing on the asphalt wearing skis
And behind my back is a backpack, inflated by the wind...
I stand there and don’t know why this is all?
After all, it’s time for me to go to work... Oh my!

Answer from Vlad Ivanov[guru]
“I’m standing on the asphalt wearing skis.
It’s just that the skis don’t work, that’s because I’m crazy,”
It's day outside, the moon has risen into the sky,
Silence screams into my ears.
A janitor rakes flowers with a shovel,
I have never seen better beauty anywhere, -
Roses, daisies and cornflowers
The male dogs are gnawing like bones.
The locksmith turns on the light on the street,
This means that dawn will come soon,
Someone came up to him point-blank,
He made an injection with a thick needle.
Here he flies up like a mosquito,
His orderly extinguishes the blow,
Eyes wide open, smile on the face,
The fried egg on the right egg is crumpled.
The electrician flushed water into the toilet,
And, like a fountain, it splashed us all,
Our room is clogged again,
The prosecutor swims breaststroke between us.
The doctor performed an operation on a neighbor,
With a scalpel he gently conducts a conversation,
He cut off his arms and sewed on his legs,
And he says: “You’re a crocodile now!”
Poets leave their portraits for the meeting,
Making cutlets out of rats for breakfast,
Only Leo Tolstoy did not come down, he became sad,
Maybe he has given birth to “war with the world” again.
Who am I? Why am I? And why here?
I think it’s been a month, I just don’t understand
I look into myself, and there are lights in my eyes!
Should I change my skis to skates?)))
Vlad NEZHNY © 06/20/2015

Are you friends with sports?
- Nope, just with the athletes!
This is not a joke, this is my honest answer to my friend Lena’s question in the comments to her post Sports, which she wrote for the next game at our friend Kakadu Oh, sporrrt, - you are life!
I agree.

My childhood was during a time of triumph, in our great and vast country at that time, in almost all types of winter sports. As a young lady, I didn’t care about anything other than figure skating, naturally, and since I was active by nature, according to my mother, I had an awl in one place, I won’t elaborate, because it’s not true, my dad decided to direct my activity in the direction that I wanted to your liking. Yes. My dad bought me amazingly beautiful, white figure skates with boots, as I remember now, from the Botos company, and my mother took me to the figure skating section, which was opened by a young, recently married (from Volgograd) officer of the Central Research Institute of the Air Force, coach.

The trainer twirled my arms, checked the stretch and asked my mother:
- Does the girl have connective tissue dysplasia? It almost bends into a roll! Great! Put on your skates. On the ice!
So at the age of six, I joined the ranks of the hope of Soviet sports. In addition to the numerous abrasions on the knees, there were added bruises that lasted for months, because the ice is hard, it’s an infection!
I didn’t have great hope for long. Just 2.5 years later, during training, during a sweep, which I always performed with excellent speed, I fell and for some reason stopped breathing.

The doctor shouted at my mother. Loud. Mom was crying, dad was smoking. This is how my sports career ended.

Then we left for Irkutsk. And then the unexpected happened to me. Skis!!!
Who, who came up with this? Sports for Pinocchio-like people! Two woods on legs, and how to rotate in this? Two sticks in hands! How can you keep your hands busy?! No beauty of movement!
I was outraged, but no one canceled physical education at school, and in winter all classes were held in a grove not far from the school, where a deep ski track was laid.

Having successfully completed winter classes in the fifth and sixth grades, in the seventh grade my physical teacher was in trouble because I came to class. Ski lessons in physical education were held on the same day in pairs, the last lessons. Our physical education teacher, Yuri Vladimirovich, a tall, athletic and good-natured man of about 35, gave us skis, poles and some kind of wax for skis.

And so my class and I, for the first time, go to the grove. On the shoulder, rattling their bindings, lie wooden drums called skis. How they wear it on their feet, I don’t know, but the girls help me, and in our class they are all skiers and athletes! Yes. I was the disgrace of the class. In winter. In the hall, I was an ornament, but in the grove I was a disgrace.

Yuri Vladimirovich waves a flag, clicks a stopwatch, and all our boys are blown away by the wind. How they ran! Mom dear! A herd of running bison is just snails in the spring compared to the Siberian boys on the ski track!

But Yuri Vladimirovich again waves the flag, clicks the stopwatch, and all our girls are also blown away by the wind. I also started moving, trying not to fall off the ski track. Not in a big hurry. What's the hurry? I still can’t keep up with our girls, so what’s the point of puffing in vain? I didn’t roll for long, maybe 150 meters, and then I heard a wild scream: “Lyyizhnyuyu!!!”
Don't understand which one? Who's yelling? Andryush, why are you straining yourself?

Andryukha yells with good obscenities “Ski track!!! Move aside, chicken!
I?! That's for me? What a bastard! Who am I? Yes. Tomorrow the first lesson is geometry, the second is physics, well, well! So let's see how you puff at the board without prompting!
Contemplating insidious plans for Andryukha for tomorrow, I decided to leave the ski track to the side. I decided to get off nicely. It seemed to me that sliding off it was much more aesthetically pleasing than walking sideways, lifting up my legs like a heron!
But something went wrong, and I realized that a forward somersault, with skis on my feet, could only be achieved by a particularly gifted person. I managed. Only there were three skis. One whole, one in half, and I got a little stuck with one leg and one whole ski on a tree.

The physical education teacher was pale. Unhooking my ski leg from the tree, he dragged me out of the snowdrift, which drowned me almost a meter deep, and sitting me down under some birch tree, he began to feel my arms, legs, head and ask, “Where does it hurt? How many fingers do you see? and other nonsense.
Then Yuri Vladimirovich screamed. Loud. On me, on Andryukha and on the Lord God, who sent him this difficult test, and he still has small children and why does he need all this?

That time they sent me out of class.
A week later, history practically repeated itself, but I was still able to drive a circle around the grove! I was happy. Then Seryoga carried me off the ski track, and Lenka practically drove over me, both shouted “It would be better if you were sick in winter!”
From the lesson I was sent back to school, because it was inconvenient to ski on broken skis.

After the third pair, lost during a ski lesson, Yuri Vladimirovich rendered a verdict. Sit in the locker room, read a book, but don’t you dare touch your skis!!
So, my career as a skier ended ingloriously. But by that time I was already accustomed to the blows of sports fate, so I did not suffer much, especially since 2 times a week I compensated for my sports insufficiency at the skating rink!

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